How May I Assist You?

If you are fooled by the title, it is completely understandable. This is a short football related blog post for my own (and people who knows football) enjoyment. If you are not into football, please do not leave comments. I will understand and I will not hate you. In fact, this time, I will delete all those “Not into football”, “Don’t know football” type of comments without notice.

I am so happy with Arsenal’s hard fought victory over Manchester City last night. I was not able to watch the match, but I certainly enjoyed reading all the articles that comes with an Arsenal victory, especially over their mega rich title rivals. Who would have thought that we would go strength to strength with our depleted squad even after our three key players Alexis, Santi and Coquelin were out injured? But we did, a huge part of it thanks to this man, the most expensive player Arsenal ever bought: Mesut Ozil. For last night’s match, he had two more assists under his belt.

If you are a non football person and are still reading, an assist is basically… the final pass that led to someone else scoring a goal. Person A passed the ball to Person B and Person B scored a goal from that pass. That pass is what we call an assist. Now this may sound very unexciting, but the truth is, it is very important. Most of the time, a goal can only happen if the striker receives an extraordinary pass from a teammate which no one from the opposing team sees coming, leaving him with a simple task of kicking the ball into the net. Only a footballer with great vision is able to conjure spectacular assists on a regular basis. In some ways, the assist is more highly regarded than the goal itself.

And this is what Mesut Ozil is all about. This German midfield maestro is currently the King of Assist in the English football league this season. He’s played in 16 matches and has already recorded 15 assists. This means he contributed to almost a goal in every match! That is very impressive! Especially when the current number 2 in the assist ranking is only on 7.

I’m so glad that Wenger (the manager), that Ebenezer Scrooge reincarnation Arsene Wenger, was willing to part to £42.5 million to buy him a few years ago. I’m sure most Arsenal fans are, too. In fact, this season, there are so many memes that the fans made to celebrate this visionary maestro’s impressive achievements.




Hopefully he will keep up with his form throughout the season. With Man Utd and Chelsea being shit and Man City being wobbly, at the moment it is a two horse race between us and Leicester City. This might be our best chance to land the Premier League title after so many years.

Hopefully we will not self destruct in the second half of the season like how we often do in recent years. Come On You Gunners!


  1. Well, well, I learnt something new today. So an assist is the one who indirectly contributes to the scoring of the goal. It’s great that the assist gets credit for what he did, eh? Usually in other situations it’s the one who “scored the goal” who gets the glory, never mind that someone else helped him do it. And finally, I understand what is a meme 😀

    • Actually the goalscorers still do get most of the glory. That’s why Messi and C Ronaldo are the 2 highest paid players in the world. But true football fans would appreciate all the other stats like assists and great tackling and great defense. Just like true basketball fans would understand that the rebound (grabbing balls that bounced away from the net) is every bit as crucial as scoring.

  2. Yes, I agree…this is the best chance for Arsenal to win this season (after…what? 11 trophyless years??) It’s a straight fight between Man City and Arsenal unless the dark horse gallops to the finishing line (something I’ll root since this season is turning out to be one of most unpredictable seasons…watch out for Spurs too)! This is a topsy turvy season where the good ones from last season (Swansea, Southampton & West Ham included) have fallen from grace and the newly promoted teams of Leicester, Bournemouth and Watford have beaten the crap out of the top teams!

    Coming back to Ozil…I remembered he had a torrid season last year when everyone was questioning his ability and that Wenger has bought the wrong guy and he turned it around this year. I can feel Wenger sniggering and having the last laugh over his hated rival Jose but if he doesn’t win it this year…people will remember the “specialist in failure” remark…wakakaka….not that I condone the remark from my beloved manager. After all, Wenger’s got only one team to contend with this year (unlike the usual three in the top four).

    Good luck to your beloved team….but with all the craziness this year….I’m rooting for some other team that’s usually not in the top four to win it this year! 😀

    • If we f**ked up again this time like previously, I would rather Leicester win it. I really want them to last the entire season in the fight and not do a Hull if you know what I mean. West Ham looked good in the first 3 games to be honest, but they’re not as spectacular as Leicester.

      I have never doubted Ozil, but I got worried with all the criticisms from those so-called fans who don’t watch football properly. Thankfully he is made of sterner stuff and exhibit the famous “mental strength” that Wenger always spews hahaha! And it seems like Mou is on the way to Old Trafford. Actually last night I dreamed of Mou taking over the Malaysia football team! There’s coincidentally a vacancy there…

  3. When my 50 school mates talked in watsap, they often got mad and vulgar when football teams were uttered. Now they created another room for football chats and your post stirs the memories today.
    So I am sober and will not fight with you. Wakakakaka

    Arsenal will win!! Happy?

    • No, not really. You took a long and creative way to say “I’m not into football”. I don’t mind the fight and trash talking from fellow football fans.

  4. It takes an unselfish player to assist. Some players just want to try their luck and shoot from a position that every one could clearly see that a goal is not that possible and we can see another player in a better position to take the shot but player one is selfish to pass the ball to second player thus resulting in no goal. Good for Ozil! Hopefully Arsenal wins this season!

    • Hopefully. Deep down, like any other Gooner though, we are anxious of any bad moment that might trigger a spectacular downfall. We’ve been through such agony more times that we like to! 😐

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