It was a pretty stressful day at work today even for my standards, I was going stir crazy, and I started to spew random crap out of my mouth to lighten my own mood as well as the mood of some colleagues. Somewhere along the line, I mimicked this introduction of a radio talk show.
大家好！欢迎收听[笑谈广东话]！我系你架节目主持人，利孝和！吨吨吨吨 吨吨吨吨 吨吨吨吨 吨吨~
Dai gar hou! Foon ying shau teng [xiu tam gwong dong wah]! Ngor hai lei ga jit mook zhu chi yan, Lei Hao Wo! Dun-dun-dun-dun Dun-dun-dun-dun Dun-dun-dun-dun Dun-dun~
Hello everyone! Thanks for tuning into [Learn Cantonese with Laughter]! I am your host, Lei Hao Wo! Dun-dun-dun-dun Dun-dun-dun-dun Dun-dun-dun-dun Dun-dun~
A few of the colleagues were perplexed by this mimicking of mine. I was in turn perplexed by their being perplexed. They have never heard this radio talk show before. I began to play one of the clips I can find online, and immediately brought laughter to them.
This radio talk show was hugely popular when I was in college. I thought it was popular nationwide, if not worldwide. Apparently it was only popular in my college, or maybe just in my class. Have anyone of you heard of this show before? Anyway, for benefit of doubt, let me introduce (or re-introduce) to you this awesome radio talk show.
笑谈广东话/xiu tam gwong dong wah/Learn Cantonese with Laughter – this is a comedy section of a radio talk show by 森美 Sum Mei, a famous radio DJ and actor of Hong Kong.
This talk show aspires to educate tourists on the proper usage of certain
vulgar advanced Cantonese phrases. He explains the meaning of the phrases, and gives practical examples on how to apply them in day to day life. It was hoped that by mastering these advanced phrases, tourists can more successfully masquerade themselves as Hong Kong locals when visiting. Or at least that’s what Sum Mei hoped 😀 .
There are hundreds of clips available online if you are really interested, but let me just share my Top 3 favorite ones here.
1. 你咪当我Lulu喎！Nei mai dong ngor Lulu wor!
Literal translation: Don’t treat me like Lulu!
Meaning: Don’t take me for a fool! I have no idea why Lulu is a representation of fool/idiot/stupid though.
2. 你读屎片架？Lei dook si pin gar?
Literal translation: Did you study with toilet paper?
Meaning: Are you stupid? A person who studied with books are intelligent, a person who behaves in an unintelligent way is assumed to have studied with toilet rolls that are used to wipe shit off the ass a.k.a studied shit.
3. 你唔好扮晒蟹喎！Lei mm hou ban sai hai wor!
Literal translation: Stop pretending to be a crab!
Meaning: Stop faking! Human and crab is fundamentally different. A human who tries to pretend to be a crab is obviously going to fail, and it will be very obvious.
I think it won’t be funny if you just read, you need to listen to the actual clips by Sum Mei using his moronic tone to feel the funny-ness. Just a few will do actually. As I mentioned, there are hundreds of clips online, when I first listened to these clips, I managed to last 40 clips, then I began to get bored 😀 .